| Daily Doses: |
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| Currently Reading: |
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| Good For My Eyes: |
Sydney Opera House |
| To Name A Few: |
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| Blogs About Books: |
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| Awesome Authors: |
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| Good For My Ears: |
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| When I Have Time: |
24 - Fox
Beauty and the Geek - CW
Lost - ABC
Family Guy - Fox
The Simpsons - Fox
I Love Lucy - Fox
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| Too much alone time |
| Tuesday, March 13, 2007 |
I haven't seen Benny since Valentines Day. I've called him twice since then, but both times he was out of town. He forgot our 5 year anniversary, and hasn't tried to contact me since. Despite all this, I've been trying to move forward with my life. Each day I keep myself busy with work, chatting with friends, exercising, and reading. Because of all this crap I'm going through, there are times when I just want to be alone. I don't want my mom asking me why I'm not seeing Benny that weekend, and I most definitely don't want to see my brother and his new gf acting so lovey dovey. Being alone is good sometimes, but it's also the only time I allow myself to think about Benny and therefore become depressed.
This is my fourth consecutive week out of town. My first two weeks I was out here by myself. I thought last week and this week would be better with my whole team out. As it turns out, they all want to do their own thing after work, be it study, work out, buy some food to bring back to their room.
So here I am, in my hotel room (I've hopped to four different hotels in four weeks) watching American Idol. I don't know why, but I just watched a performance where some girl sang the words "I've been missing you," and I just lost it. I thought about how much I miss him and the tears just started coming out. I just began to sob, not just a few tears sliding down my cheek, I'm talking about crying so hard you're taking shuddering breaths.
I wish I weren't alone right now. I've had enough of alone time. I wish I had all my cousins here, my gal pals, or just a shoulder to cry on. Or maybe I should just stop listening to music with lyrics about being lonely or missing someone.Labels: Benny, Venting |
posted by Daphne @ 9:07 PM   |
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| 4 Comments: |
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Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry you're going through this right now...it sucks, but know that I'm here whenever you want to talk, alrighty?
(((((Daphne))))))
You're a strong and beautiful woman, what doesn't break you will only make you stronger and I won't let this break you, alrighty?
Love you!
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Ahh, babe. I'm sorry. Being alone is never easy. But you know, you could call me. I'm right here!
LOVE YOU BUNCHES AND BUNCHES!
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Big hugs. You are not alone my dear. we are all here for you. Just remember that.
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We love you at Awesome Family Fun!!!!! Keep smiling because your smile is just too cute!
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Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry you're going through this right now...it sucks, but know that I'm here whenever you want to talk, alrighty?
(((((Daphne))))))
You're a strong and beautiful woman, what doesn't break you will only make you stronger and I won't let this break you, alrighty?
Love you!