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| Wedding Fever |
| Sunday, February 15, 2009 |
My brother got married yesterday. Well, technically he was already married on paper since last August. So what I'm referring to is the actual church ceremony. Which is great news, considering my parents didn't want to acknowledge he and his wife were married until it was by a priest.
It's been a roller coaster of emotions in my family for the past several months. First, there was the announcement back in August 2008 that they were getting married. The setting: after dinner in a Chinese restaurant. Normally it wouldn't be a big deal to see my family in a Chinese restaurant. But you see, my brother never takes us out to dinner. So when he and my sister-in-law (hey, I might as well get used to calling her that now) randomly announced that they wanted to take the family out to dinner, we were all very suspicious. Oh, and by "family" I don't mean just the five of us. I mean like.. cousins, grandparents, you know... a small gathering of about 20 people. I remember the week leading up to the dinner my mom made a comment to me along these lines.... "I hope they're not planning to make some crazy announcement like they're getting married, because I'll have a heart attack in public."
Yah, not exactly the way I'd want my parents to react if I ever announced I was getting married. Judging from that statement, I advised my brother to tell my parents in private first. Shortly after that, I found out that they had actually eloped and got married in the courthouse, oh about.. a year ago. I won't bore you with more details, but let's just say that I talked my brother into telling my parents the whole truth, and well... I don't think I ever want to see my parents that upset again. To make amends, my brother and SIL decided to go through the marriage course at our church. After a few months of these courses, answering questionnaires about their views on marriage, raising kids, finances, etc. and meeting with the priest, they finally set a date. January 2009 they announced that they wanted the wedding to be February 14th, Valentines day. One month. That's all we had to put together this wedding.
I must say, I was expecting it to be a disaster. Let's face it, one month in wedding time is like a blink of an eye. I was a bridesmaid and normally I would've loved to help with wedding preparations, but work is so busy right now. I barely made it to David's Bridal on the weekdays since it closed at 9pm. So really I had only a few assignments. Try on dress, order dress, try on shoes, order shoes with dye to match dress color, show up at wedding. I really didn't get to see the rest of what SIL was planning for the big day. The wedding ended up being really beautiful given the time and budget we had. Friday night, right after the wedding rehearsal and before I went to bed, I had a good cry. I think I was finally able to let go....of.... I dunno. I wouldn't say it's anger, or bitterness. But I'll be honest, there was always something about their relationship that I didn't like. I was really judgmental of her, of their relationship, of their secrets they kept from my parents. It's something I'm not proud of. I mean, who am I to judge? But I think that night as I cried myself to sleep, I think I finally made my peace with all this. Instead of being sad (which of course a part of me was) that my brother was leaving us, that he would never sleep in this house again, I felt this great abundance of joy in my heart. Joy that my brother was happy, that he was able to make peace with God, my parents, himself.
So I am happy to report, that the story has a happy ending. It was a great celebration, and I'm blessed to have been a part of it. Now of course the relatives are all taking bets that I'm next (my brother and I are the oldest of the cousins from both mom and dad's side) and since I'm a girl, I can't help but get all excited at the thought of my big day. God willing, I hope that I can have a beautiful wedding with all my loved ones present. When I was younger, or even not that many years ago, I always envisioned my wedding to be this big grand thing. Very fancy, very elegant. Now that I'm older and gaining more perspective in life, I realize that while those things would be nice, more importantly, it's the family and friends, and God's presence that I want most. In the end, nobody really cares about how much you spent on your dress, your hair/makeup, your table centerpieces. I want the focus to be on a marriage, as opposed to a wedding. Still, it doesn't hurt to start putting together pictures for my slide show. :)Labels: Family |
posted by Daphne @ 10:24 PM   |
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